DIY Champion of Great Britain.

This blog owes itself to Danny, one of my MySpace buddies. Great blogging too, Danny. I started to write a comment on his blog about bodging and I got carried away with it so decided that it would make a decent contribution to the world of bodging.


The Great Britain British Bodger Competition.

They could run an annual competition to find the best/worst bodger in the UK.

My contribution to bodging concerned my fitting of a new bathroom carpet (we’ve long since ceased using carpet in the bathroom, I think it coincided with my aim not being so reliable).

Anyway, I had to fit this new carpet around a peculiar array of pedestal, toilet pan and peculiar angles that the skirting-board offered, but :: PING! :: I had an idea.

I cleared a flat spot on the back yard and laid out the new carpet, pile uppermost.

I then fetched the old carpet from the bathroom and laid it atop the new pile uppermost.

I got a new piece of white chalk and set out drawing a line on the new carpet using the old one as the template. Can you see anything wrong yet? No!? No, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with this procedure, I can assure you that it will and does work.

Unless! Unless you discover that the pile on the new carpet won’t take CHALK! So :: PING! :: I have another brainwave.

I take off the old carpet from off the new.

I turn over the new carpet and have the chalk-able backing uppermost.

I lay the old carpet back atop the new and I chalk around it. Perfect! I can now get my new Stanley Knife to do its work. I didn’t cut myself once - no blood and gore - and the cutting of the new carpet to the size and shape of the old template was a complete success. Almost!I dumped the old carpet in the bin and carried the new upstairs to lay it in the bathroom. It fitted perfectly.

It fitted perfectly - UPSIDE BLOODY DOWN!!!

Doh!