G-spots before the eyes.

How do I find a G-Spot.


How do you women, in general, expect we mere male mortals to find the G-spot when you keep moving it? This subject has always mystified us and no small blame can be attributed to the newspaper problems pages, either.

This elusive spot has, over the years, been placed at a reference point just one inch up in the front wall of the vagina to one and a half inches up, through to two inches up and now they've come along and moved it over three inches to a full FIVE BLOODY INCHES! It appears that I've been scraping away at the wrong spot for years. And I thought her tears were of love and ecstasy.

They further muddy the waters, so to speak, by going on about women who love climaxing through oral sex performed on them. (I too can reach climax while performing the same stunt, but that's another matter). Cum on! Very very few men come equipped with a five inch tongue not even if it's erect.

But we can forget all this now 'cos in my newspaper today the headline is: There are girls out there with NO G-spot!!

Studies at the University of L'Aquila in Italy (where else) have discovered that there are women out there with NO G-spot!! Study leader Dr Emmanuele Janini says that women without a G-spot would struggle to reach orgasm through intercourse (get away!) but could still get satisfaction via other forms of stimulation (pass the chocolates).

Yes lads, NO G-spot, so you can stop looking. Concentrate instead on finding other ways to please your women (for a start you could try doing the ironing).

In a similar vein it is much the same with men who write in to these problem pages worried about being abnormal in the trouser department. They write in stating: ".... I'm four.... five and two thirds..... six..... eight and one eighth..... eleven and three-quarters long in the trouser department, am I normal?"

Of course you ain't normal! What are you doing with a bloody tape measure at a time like this anyway? It's not DIY! (Oh yes it is).

The sex "expert" invariably assures them that they are indeed normal! But how can taking a tape measure into the bathroom and whisking their todgers into a state of abject arousal and then sliding a tape-measure along it and making notes be NORMAL? If you're not trained in the use of such measuring devices, you might even be getting your imperials mixed up with those foreign decibel measurements in the process? And any-road-up it's the FIRST two inches that does the business, not the last two.




Mind how you come,

Juan Kerr.