Church of England to be banished.

Jeremy Clarkson. You either hate him or you hate him.

(Well I don't rate him, anyway.)

But in today's Sun newspaper he makes a point that I am at last in agreement with.

The Church of England has to go.....sorry!


He writes:

This week, a Church of England bishop popped out of his pulpit and announced that Terry Wogan is no different from Austrian cellar maniac Josef Fritzl.

Bishop of Stafford, Gordon Mursell says that anyone who refuses to believe in climate change is condemning their children, like Fritzl, to a life of darkness and misery. So its not only Terry then. It's also the man who founded Greenpeace, environmentalist David Bellamy and a great many respected scientists (and me).

"They are all murderers!!!! Murderers d'you here..... And God will strike them down with furious anger!!!!!!"

Like his boss, the Canterbury clown Rowan Williams, Mr Mursell is nothing more than a bonkers bishop, as stupid and dangerous as the mad mullahs we hear so much about.

But he has given me an idea.

Back in the early Eighties, a lot of Church People like Mr Mursell, said that the Cold War could be stopped if Britain unilaterally dismantled its nuclear weapons, that if we were the first to jump, the Russians would follow suit.

Well, how's this for a plan? In the current climate of global religious tension, why don't we unilaterally dismantle the Church of England? I'm being serious. Over the years, religion and the wars it caused, has killed more people than any other single thing. It is more dangerous than riding a motorcycle bollock naked at 186mph, through a razor blade factory.

So if we in Britain can demonstrate that we can get by without an army of bishops, vicars and campanologists, maybe the hard-line Muslims in Iran and Iraq would think: "Yes. We will abandon our mosques and this morning, instead of attacking the British soldiers, we will go into their camps and give them a biscuit.

Who know, it might even spread. The Pope could decide to hand over the Catholic Church's vast wealth to the poor and get a job as an aid worker. Or better still, an AIDS worker. This would allow people everywhere to use condoms and have abortions. It'd be brilliant.

Of course, unilaterally getting rid of the Church of England might achieve nothing at all. The Muslims, the Catholics and those loonies in America's southern states might carry on as normal. But at least we will be free from the tyranny of noisy church bells on a Sunday morning, and we'd never again have to listen to a load of Left-wing nonsense from the pulpit.

*Do you agree with Jeremy? Have your say now at thesun.co.uk/columnists